I feel like my life's just out of reach, but how do you grasp something you only see out of the corner of your eye?

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Under his watchful eye

Had a few days after that last post to sit and figure things out.  Sure I've sort of rushed into something here, but really I don't see any other choice for me. 

That said, dealing with the devil in a red hoodie isn't going to be fun.  I've only seen him once so far.  He just showed up for a bit, gave me some money, a cell and a charger, and said something cryptic about work to do soon.  I asked him to tell me what's going on, to at least know what I am supposed to do.  He just gave me a look that I remember far too well, and suddenly I didn't give a damn anymore about what was to be done.  I did manage to ask for those anti psychotics that I had before, because holy shit I need them nowadays.  He relented to that, not that he had them on hand, but he seemed confident he'd get ahold of them for me.

Then he left.  Just disappearing into thin air, he'd take a step, and suddenly not be there anymore.  Much like someone else I know.  I know *what* happens, but I don't know how it happens.  I understand this Path stuff, I've read enough to get that there's a place that people can walk into if they know how.

I don't know how it happens, or what you have to do, nor what it looks like there.  I admit, its a neat trick, its majorly fucked up to consider that there's people out there who can effectively motherfucking teleport, but I guess when you're exposed to supernatural shit after a while it rubs off.  I've read about people trying to go toe to toe with the monster, or surviving utterly deadly moments, even claiming to do magic of some sort.

I don't know how I feel about all this, but I'm sick of being helpless, I'm sick of the stares on the street.   At least today, I could afford to eat.  Bought myself some gloves but I don't like wearing them.  It doesn't feel right, and I use that term loosely, since I can't really feel anything in my hands. 

On the bright side, I haven't seen anything that I shouldn't.  I managed to sleep for three hours as well.  I have to say, there's a strange sense of security now that things are 'official'. 

I wouldn't say things are looking up, but damn if I didn't enjoy a pizza, some soda and a night of fucking rest.  I wonder if this is part of the gimmick, being a bad guy.   Not having to deal with horrors anymore, not running for my damn life every day. 

I'm sure things are bound to get worse, but today I can almost smile...


  1. Unfortunate, you were one of the bravest of the _runners_, or most moronic, or any combination of the two. Well I hope your new "career" choice works out in the end. Or at the very least your death is quick and painless, but this probably will not be the case, it most likely will be drawn out,and very excruciating.

    1. Brave? Seriously? I'll remind you that not all of us get to be brave heroes. Not all of us just die, either. Just a fool who succumbed here.