I feel like my life's just out of reach, but how do you grasp something you only see out of the corner of your eye?

Monday, March 26, 2012

just when I thought I had it bad, someone reminds me that they're worse

Guess I should be thankful, but fuck if I know how to do that anymore.  Is this what I get to look forward to?  More misery?  I mean, this guy's toughed it out longer than me,   balls man, he's done a lot of hardcore shit and it takes this long for his world to fall apart.  Maybe he's tougher than me, heh,  probably

Maybe ordinary people don't always crack. Maybe there isn't any need to crawl under a rock with all the other slimy things when trouble hits, or give in the moment things turn to shit... maybe it was just me all the time.  Maybe that’s why I’m alone, adrift.  I couldn’t be bothered to take accountability, to fight for my own self.

maybe I just want to blame others because it makes me feel like I can't take control.  Maybe I am still here, still talking, because I haven't given up, despite what I've said and done.

I need to think.


  1. no one "needs" to think. they just do.
    humanity's infallible weakness - no off switch.

    1. well I think you "need" to shut it.

    2. no offense intended.
      they just appreciate percolation.

      you leave a pot to sizzle for a time, it's alright. for too long? the whistling and screaming kick up.
      a crying pot sits always on its stove.

      right now, taking a pot away isn't in our best interest, in anyone's interest but theirs.

  2. I know this doesn't suit the sombre mood and I'm sorry if this offends you, but it had to be done.